Trending in the right direction

Well, hello there!

I'm happy to report that I lost weight this past week - now trending in the right direction! The total amount that I lost was 1.8, but for the purposes of the tracker above, it only shows 1.6 down...and that's because I was up 0.2 the week before.

Anyway, YAY ME!  This past week was especially hard because we had a snow storm on Friday in Denver and work was cancelled.  That meant me.  In my house.  Alone.  With all the snacks I wanted.  And silly me didn't think that the snow was going to be that bad, so I assumed that I'd be able to stock up on the essentials (like fresh fruit) later.  Not so much.  I survived though...and made the best choices possible.

This week, I'm on a business trip - in fact, as I write this I'm in the town of Goldsboro, NC.  Traveling, in the past, always meant being on vacation and eating whatever the heck I wanted.  And what I wanted was to binge.  And I'll admit, I did a bit of that last night when I ordered boneless chicken wings at Chili's for my dinner (washed down with a large wheat beer).  BUT I definitely had the points left for that...and besides, that is precisely what sounded good after all day travel.  I had already had my nutritional breakfast in the morning, a baggie of cut up apples as a snack on the first leg of my trip, and a healthy turkey and swiss sandwich (with coleslaw) for lunch in the airport in Cleveland (when the burger joint across the way smelled much more appetizing).

This morning's breakfast buffet had no fruit options and no real "healthy" options.  So I stuck with peanut butter and a toasted bagel and a coffee.  For lunch I had a half of a footlong Subway sandwich loaded with veggies and had the other half for dinner.  I did enjoy a package of Sun Chips with each sandwich and I splurged and had Skittles as an afternoon snack.  Other than that?  Nada.  Truthfully? I miss my mid-afternoon fruit and veggie snacks.  Maybe I haven't made the best of choices every time, but I think overall, I've done well - and I've done markedly better than what I ever have done in the past.

This trip has actually been a huge blessing because I have a nasty cold that has me sniffling, sneezing, and coughing often.  I had some work to do today at the manufacturing plant that I visited here, but for the afternoon and early evening, I was able to nap and read a book.*  And honestly?  That has been just what I needed.

I make my return back to Denver tomorrow and with any luck will be able to restock my fridge with fresh items for the weekend and have a nutritious dinner at home. 

I'm determined to have another loss this week.  I'm determined to get some miles in this weekend if the weather cooperates so that I can start preparing for my 7K in a month.

I'm determined to keep trending in the right direction.

* Confession time: I'm actually on my third book since leaving Denver yesterday morning...I read the first two books in "The Hunger Games" trilogy and am 28% through the last one.  If you're looking for a book to distract you from eating (because you're so into it), these might be the ones for you.

Things I love: Unsweetened Vanilla Almond Breeze

For YEARS I've been drinking skim milk.  Because for years, nutritionists and know-it-all's alike preached the health benefits of it.  Who doesn't love things that are fat-free?  And when you compare the stats on skim milk to whole fat buttermilk, skim wins by a watery landslide.

But when I started reading more about soy milk and almond milk, I became curious.

I've found a new love - especially for coffee and oatmeal.  It's UNSWEETENED Vanilla Almond Breeze.

The stats stack up like this:

That's ONE (1) point for a cup of this...and because it's thicker, I think it feels more indulgent than skim milk - but again, it still has the same point value!

Like I said, I use it in my coffee (my to-go cups hold two cups of coffee, one cup of this, and a few squirts of sugar-free syrup) every morning.  Here's my tip for coffee: heat up the "milk" first before mixing it with the coffee...it keeps your coffee hotter longer instead of cooling it down immediately.  Lukewarm coffee isn't my favorite.

The flavor is *slightly* nutty and there is a vanilla flavor (not sweet though)...but definitely not overpowering.  The color is definitely darker than skim milk and again, it's more opaque. 

I think it's available in the normal dry goods sections of stores, but I get mine in the refrigerated section - and the half gallon is typically good for about a month (according to the expiration date on the carton).  They suggest that you use the product within 7 days of opening, but by using over a cup a day, this isn't a huge issue for me.

There are other flavors that I'm aware of are pictured above - but they are more calories and the sweetened versions are definitely sweet.  My father picked up some regular sweetened almond milk and it was too sweet to mix into my coffee...then again, I'm not a huge fan of overly sweetened coffees.

Have any of you used low points options (other than milk) to lighten your coffee?

Reversing a train

Last week, at Weight Watchers, the scale told me that I gained a few lots of pounds.  If you recall, this was no surprise.  But I wasn't done.

That trending continued through half of the week...but not with as much momentum.  And by Friday, I stopped the train of reckless self-abandon.  By Sunday, I had turned it around completely.

So when I stepped on the scale last night, I was up 0.4 pounds.

I think the hardest thing to do is to stop doing whatever it is that is causing you harm and to choose something different.  I find this especially difficult when what I'm craving is comfort.

Because when I crave comfort, I want to feel good, loved, and, well...comfortable.  Know what isn't comfortable?  Feeling alone.  Feeling deprived.  Feeling out of control.

So sometimes, when I crave comfort, I go for overeating as the solution.  It doesn't feel particularly great, at least, not after the binge-like behavior.  But in the moment?  Endorphins get released, things feel good, things taste good, and more importantly, they feel familiar.

Comfortable.

That is, until the self-loathing comes along.  Although, to be completely honest, that's pretty damn familiar too.

While part of me is ashamed that it took me a week and a half of absolutely horrible eating practices to turn this thing around, part of me is happy that at least I didn't wait until a Monday to make changes.

In fact, yesterday is the first Monday in a LONG time that I haven't gone over my points.  I didn't feel deprived at any point in the day.  I had delicious healthy meals that fueled my body better than crappy food I had been putting in it the previous two weeks.

At the end of the day, I realized that I was okay with not continuing to eat.  I was satisfied - especially after enjoying a serving of Ben & Jerry's new decadent ice cream. 

I counted up my points and voila!  I hit my target exactly.

Today, I had a good breakfast.  I have snacks of veggies, cheese, and fruit for the day.  For lunch I have a delicious veggie wrap and tomato soup and for dinner, I'll have tortilla crusted baked tilapia with broccoli. 

My freezer and fridge are stocked with healthy options.  And while those things don't bring about the same comfort as over-eating does, it does bring about a different feeling of comfort. 

My body, itself, feels comfortable.  I have more energy and I don't feel sluggish after meals.  I feel comfort in staying within my financial budget too by eating food that I already have in my house and not swinging by my local fast food place to buy crap food.

This week, I just want to continue this trend.  I want to continue to eat fresh foods that make my body feel good.  I also want to add in an element of exercise.  I want to not binge on Sunday during the game.  I want to weigh less next week than I did this week.

All of those things are within my control.  All of those things are in the path that I'm currently on. I just need to keep going.

Which way is the music??

I went to my Weight Watchers meeting last night and gained back almost all of the weight that I've lost.

Before I stepped on the scale, my leader asked me, "So...how are things?"  And I gave her the most honest reply I could - being, "I don't want to talk about it."

I still struggle with feeling judged when I step on the scale.  Probably because I still struggle with judging myself based on the number on the scale.  But I didn't feel like discussing all that.  I didn't feel like having a heavy conversation last night. 

So I weighed.  I updated my weight loss tracker at the top of this page.  I stayed for the meeting.  I listened to other people's successes.  And my mood lightened and I started to shed the harsh judgements that only I heap on myself.

I got the weigh in sticker that indicated that I gained and you know what?  The world didn't stop turning.  No one on the street (or even in the meeting) gasped at me or shielded me from their baby's gaze.

Huh.  Go figure.

So I gained.  It's done.  All I can do is come up with a plan for today and for this week.

My plan for this week?  Track.  I do better when I track...and I'm not just talking about weight loss (though they seem to go hand in hand).  When I track, I have a moment to plan, to slow down, and process what it is that I really want.

Last night I met a friend at a restaurant near my meeting...and when I got there, I was famished.  I ate half of the appetizer, half of my entree (but all of the sweet potato fries - yum!).  And had half of the dessert. 

But before I went, I checked out some points values online and I did a pretty good job picking things that wasn't as high in points as others.  This morning, I counted my points, figured out just how many weekly points I blew through, and then started planning for today.

And today?  I'm going to Famous Dave's for lunch with an ex-coworker.  But I've planned out the meal - not picking the "easy" and "diety" go-to choice of just salad (and wow...you might be surprised at some of those point values on the salads).

I'm having ribs, garlic mashed potatoes, and steamed broccoli.  All for 11 points. 

Tonight?  I'm having baked tortilla crusted tilapia with veggies and couscous.  Or maybe a veggie wrap made with hummus, guacamole, and fresh cut peppers,carrots, and cucumbers in a high fiber fold-up.  I'll decide tonight based on if I want a hot or cold dinner.

I like having a plan.  The engineer in me loves being a bit anal retentive.  But the rebellious teenager in me also loves being able to have variety and tasty food without feeling like I'm on a diet.  I like that I can have both.

What's your plan of attack this week?

Adapt. Grow. Evolve.

Tonight, I'm prepared for a gain.  Perhaps even the full 7.2 pounds that I lost two weeks ago.

Here's the thing.  I totally deserve the gain...just as much as I had deserved the loss up until that point.

I have eaten such vast amounts of crap in the last two weeks...and you know what?  I've felt craptastic.  Completely lethargic, depressed, and funk-i-fied.  The mood started before the food...but let's be honest, the addictive food hasn't exactly helped things, has it?

I've eaten stuff that normally never crosses my threshold and I've eaten it in abundance.

Go figure why the scale simply must read significantly more than it did two weeks ago (last week was MLK and my center was closed).

So what to do?

Well, I COULD eat like complete crap for the next week.  I COULD follow this trend.

Or I could actually eat better and feel better.  I could feel more in control and realize that I am not victim to whatever comes into my mouth. I get to choose what goes there and what doesn't.

Just like I'm not a victim of anything else in my life.

In related news, I'm breaking up with Adele's Album "21."  It's moved past cathartic and into a moping stage for me...and I don't think that it's helping much.  It's powerful.  And sad.  And it's easy to dwell on the things I miss rather than the things I have. 

My gosh. 

Isn't that important anyway?  Rather than focusing on the things we are desiring in our minds (and mouths) that will only lead to unhappiness, let's ingest the things that are in front of us and healthy.

Let's let go of the obsessive thoughts about things that have been and instead focus on the good that is to come.

Adapt.  Grow.  Evolve.

Things I love: Sugar-Free Syrups

Not long ago, I used to frequent my local Starbucks most mornings on my way to work.

I'd get a Skinny Vanilla Latte in varying sizes and it was my own very special treat to start the day.  The skinny latte was less points/calories/fat/sugar than what I could get out of the machine at work.  And since there was no coffee pot where I was living, Starbucks seemed like a viable option.

Is here where I say that I cannot afford daily Starbucks trips?  Okay then.

picture from amazon.com

When I moved into my new place at the end of September, I had a plan.  One of the first things I unpacked was my coffee machine - and the second was opening a box with six different varieties of sugar-free syrups made by Torani.

I LOVE to make my own coffee now.  Sometimes I use flavored coffees (Dunkin' Donuts' Seasonal Vanilla Nut is my current favorite) but I always use a squirt or two of the sugar-free syrups.

First, the variety is nice because it means that it's just one more thing in my day that I get to choose - not have to endure.  I like feeling empowered - and even if it's just with a stupid syrup in the morning, I feel good about getting to pick what I want.

I set up each bottle with it's own pump (I have six bottles but only five pumps - bummer!) and they're neatly stored in my pantry - just waiting to be used. 

I haven't even come close to using even one bottle fully - and since I only have five pumps, I haven't even touched the raspberry flavor.*  So these bottles (at least for me) seem to last a LOOOONG time. Some of the reviews on Amazon indicate that people don't like the Splenda flavor - but I haven't noticed it...probably because I don't use a lot of the syrup...just one pump (or if I'm mixing I use a half pump of one flavor and a half pump of another) in my travel mug is all I need.  They're just a few calories and 0 Points Plus value.

Now, I've read some articles about the benefits of limiting sugar AND sugar-free items from our diets.  I fully believe those studies and claims.  Which is why I try to limit my sugar/sugar substitute intake.  Coffee is one of those things that I love to have just a bit of sweetness in and I don't see myself deviating from that any time soon.

*Sugar-Free Raspberry syrup...yours for the taking for FREE.  Just pay shipping (I have no idea what this would be but it can't be much, right?) and I'll get it to you.  It's never been opened or used...I just don't think I'd enjoy it in my coffee.  Send me an email at happyfunpants [at] gmail [dot]com and I'll be happy to send it to you.

And also? No one from Amazon or Torani knows I'm writing this review.  I wasn't compensated in any way...just wanted to share something that I like. :)

It's funny what dedication can do...

I lost 7.2 pounds this week! :)

I'm super happy right now.  Not because it's a big loss (although, let's be honest, that feels awesome).  Not because it's a lower number (although if my goal is to weigh less, this is a great start).  Not even because I got a five pound sticker.

But because I said I was going to do something and I did it.  Even when it was hard.  Even while having three dates - one of which was to watch the Broncos at our stadium for the playoff win (hello, beer and fatty foods much?).

What I love most is how I feel.  I have more energy and I just feel better inside my own skin.  I'm not as lethargic and I'm sleeping better.

So how'd I do it? 

Well, first, I tracked every single thing I ate.  Even when I overate.  I counted up the points whether I was within my target or not.  I think having to write down every bite helped me be more accountable and mindful of what was going in my mouth.  It made me pause and ask if I was really hungry or if I was feeling something else.

Some days I ate past my points target.  But invariably, the next day I under ate.  Not that it was intentional...it's just the way my body was.  One day I was super hungry and the next I wasn't.

So what'd I learn? 

That I can trust my body.  I still need to eat when hungry.  And I need to stop eating when I'm no longer hungry.  I need to be aware of where my calories are coming from - are they coming from higher protein foods so that I'll be satisfied longer?  Or are they coming from "empty" calories that probably won't last?

I learned that every day, without fail so far, I'm hungry at 10:15 AM.  So I have a snack prepared.  Sometimes it's a hard boiled egg.  Sometimes it's a piece of fruit.  But whatever it is, I have it ready to eat at 10:15.  Trying to white-knuckle it to lunch time leaves me feeling deprived.  Eating a snack mid-morning helps me feel more satisfied at lunch time.

My goal for this next week is to just keep tracking.  Typically tracking isn't my strong point, but I think that it's very helpful to be aware of what is going in my body.  It helps me ask questions like "Is this going to fuel me until I eat again?" "Am I hungry or do I want something else?" "What else have I eaten today that is healthy?"

Those questions (I think) are good no matter what program you're following or implementing.

It's week two of the new year, people.  How are YOU doing?

Review on the new WW Barcode App

About six months ago, I was standing in line to be weighed at my Weight Watchers meeting and a fellow buddy and I were talking about the WW app for our iPhones.

I made the statement that what would be REALLY cool is if you could scan the bar codes on the products and WW would automatically calculate the points. 

Obviously, I don't think that WW is bugging their weigh in lines, but they created the app that I was talking about!

Here's what I know about the app:

1) First of all, it's a separate app.  You have to download it separately. All of the people in my meeting didn't know.  I suspect that has everything to do with the fact that the average person in my meeting is at an age where smart phones aren't exactly "their thing."

2) It works! 

You just align the red bar with the bar code and viola!  It gives you your points plus values in just a few seconds.

I took it to the store last week and used it.  I wanted to get some chocolate pudding from the store and given the nine thousand different varieties, it would've normally taken me a few minutes to enter all the values into my calculator on the app and try to remember which value belonged with which product.  With the bar code scanner, I had my answers within a few seconds and easily picked out the one I wanted.

The cool thing about the scanner is that after you scan the bar code, it actually shows you a mini picture of the product with the description.  It's helpful because it makes it much easier to keep separate items straight when you're comparing points plus values.

To give you an example, I just scanned in my Crystal Light package and put the picture to the right.

Also, if you ever wondered what my keyboard at work looks like, now you know.  See?  I'm a giver.

3) I wish that it was an upgrade to the current WW app and not a separate one.  First, you have to log in every time you use it (the app remembers your user name and password so this isn't a huge deal), but it's just weird that you have to switch back and forth between this app and the regular app to see all of your stuff.

Overall, I'm thrilled with this app and I'm glad that Weight Watchers is striving to make their already award-winning program easier to use.

Get back up!

"Success consists of getting back up just one more time than you fall." -- Oliver Goldsmith

It's one thing to start out the new year saying that you're going to stick to a new game plan.  The fresh vow and promise of a new future are alluring.  And it's exciting to get caught up in the momentum and the thoughts of what could be.

Until you hit your first snag or setback.

Weight loss is simple...but it definitely isn't easy all the time.

Monday night I had plans with a friend for sushi.  I'm not going to lie to you, I ate/drank most of my weekly flext points that night at dinner but it was awesome.  But I tracked all the points.

Tuesday I tracked and stayed within my points range.

But Wednesay night?  That's a whole other story.

It started with me going to Costco this weekend.  I tried a sample of this broccoli slaw salad and although it was heavily dressed, I figured I could just use less dressing.  So I bought the jumbo sized bag.

Well, Wednesday night, I saw the broccoli slaw and thought that that would make a great appetizer.  Only when I looked at the nutrition label I was stumped because the serving size was the whole bag.  And the "bag" included all the veggies, but also dried cranberries, cashews, and the dressing.  I estimated the points to the best of my ability and found that I had already gone over my points for the day.

But I was still sooooo hungry!

So I ate. 

While I think it's good that we eat when we're hungry, I didn't even make the best choices.  Once I realized that I was over my points target, I indulged a bit more. 

I found myself being disappointed.  I didn't even follow the plan two days in a row.  Honestly?  I felt like a failure, if only a little bit.

At the end of the night, I ended up 12 points in the hole for the week.  Especially frustrating since I know that it's going to be difficult to stay within my points range this weekend.

But just like every other day before, the night ended.  And Thursday, in the light of the new morning, I realized I had it in me to stay on track - at least for that day.  Besides, that's all I really have control of anyway, right?  Yesterday has passed.  Today we can start again.

Thursday night ended with me being a bit under points.  Why? Because I wasn't as hungry.

So the thing that I'm happy about today?  Not that I ate less points yesterday than the day before.  Not that I feel so much better today than what I did a week ago by eating less junk.

I'm thrilled that I started over on Thursday morning; I started with the very next meal.  I thought about what might have contributed to my extreme hunger the night before and then I front loaded my day with more protein and points so that I wasn't famished by the time I got home.

I think I'm starting to realize that failure isn't what happens when you fall, it's what happens if you don't get back up.

Things I love: Ice Cubes

People, I'm going to tell you something that you probably already know: I have a sweet tooth.

And unfortunately, I've indulged it VERY OFTEN in the last few weeks.

Christmas candy?  Don't mind if I do!  Baked goods at work?  Yes, please!  And I'm not even going to tell you just how many POUNDS of Skittles I've eaten.

Some of the addiction has been the sugar.  And some of it has been the desire to put something in my mouth and chew it,

I've seen the ads for the Extra Desserts gums and I think I've tried every flavor out there.  Some are WAY better than others (Strawberry Shortcake = pretty good but Key Lime Pie = nastiness).

In my opinion, the Extra Desserts gum flavors fade pretty quickly and they don't have the texture of the gum that is my preference.

But this weekend, when I went to Costco (and did not buy any Skittles), I saw a multi-pack of Ice Cubes made by Ice Breakers.

The flavors that I've tried so far are yummy, they last a long time, and they have more of a springy (traditional smooth gum) texture that I heart.

At 0 calories per cube, they're being my go-to sugar and mouth hungry fix.

Personally, I chew two cubes at a time (I always chew two pieces at a time of pretty much any gum...what?  I have a big mouth!) for maximum awesomeness.

What I also love about the variety pack was the range of flavors...because sometimes I'm wanting something fruity and sometimes having something minty helps me feel more satisfied and finished with my meal.

Like I wrote previously, I know what I have to do to lose the weight.  I just have to do it.  And this is one way to get a sweet tooth or distract my mouth hunger long enough to get past the cravings. 


I don't think cravings are bad or that I should always deprive myself.  But balance is important. With tools like these pieces of gum, I feel like I can be better equipped with choosing which times I want to indulge and which times I don't.